- Apple : Apple would only sell Rs 500 bhelpuri. They will be sold in a packet built with the high quality smooth paper. Each bhelpuri will be of the exact same dimensions. Bhel’s will be processed in a highly secret facility in Himalayas. Apple would only let approved places to sell its bhelpuri but would not approve any seller from any of the chowpati’s due to a company policy.
- Google : Google would not make the actual bhelpuri but will open source the recipe of bhelpuri so that any bhelpuri seller would be able to sell in their own packaging. Every package would have a Google Ad on it.
- Microsoft: Microsoft would not sell bhelpuris itself but would partner with other companies who would add extra ingredients and package it for them. Their bhelpuris would be so popular and overpriced that people would steal bhelpuris from the shop.
- Samsung: Samsung would make all of the bhelpuri packet designs similar to that used by Apple. There would be bhelpuri’s ranging from Rs 10 to Rs 500. All Chowpati stores will have the Samsung bhelpuri’s.
- Micromax: Micromax would get inspired by Samsung and other bhelpuri vendors.They would make one of the cheapest bhelpuri’s. They would manage to bring Amitabh Bachan to advertise their bhelpuris’.
- Nokia: It would take a long time for Nokia to even realize that people like to eat Bhelpuris. They would be selling only cold drinks till Samsung manages to take all its business. It would then partner with Microsoft and agree to sell and package Microsoft’s Bhelpuri’s.
- Oracle: They would add panipuri , Minerial water , some shoes a tie and a bhelpuri packet in a colorful big box and call it Exa-Bhel.
- IBM: They would only sell bhelpuris outside Business parks and to those people who have a tie.
- Indian IT service based companies: They will offer to prepare the bhelpuris without puris at the cheapest cost. Companies like IBM would add the required puris , improve the packaging and sell it.
Author: Latish
Protected: Pati, Patni aur woh
God and the queues
Some very famous temples in India differentiate between rich and the poor through the system of different queues for different class of people. There could be a queue for those people who are ready to pay Rs 50 to meet the lord. There would be another queue of Rs 200 for some who think the price is worth it. The queue with the highest price means that you get to go in the fastest. Fortunately there is a still a queue existing in such places which has no price tag attached to it but as they say there is no free lunch this queue means you get to spend a lot of time (sometimes even a whole day) with your “queue-mates”.
A part of me feels this practice is wrong as money should not come anywhere between you and God. The other part of me finds this human behaviour really funny. We manage to manipulate almost everything…even Mr God.
New year
The calendar has changed to a new year.Nothing much changes.The new year will not suddenly solve the old problems or change the way how things are done.
The issues would still exist in this new year. Some will cause damage. Others might not but they would still need attention.
There would have many other things for which I did not give enough attention in the year that passed but i now realise that I should have.
I hope i make this new year actually “new” by changing things for better,if i can. I hope i will at least try to sort out many of the things which have been messed up and which i have putting in the back burner the full last year.
I hope i will be successful in many of the things i tried last year but failed.
Its time for the “New year” 😉
Why Facebook resembles a overprotective mother!
- When i am quite for a few days, she gets worried and starts pestering my friends to send me a message.
- She force feeds me all types of information i would never need from my friends..like the one who thinks he is doing the world a favor by liking or sharing ever single article on the internet about United States invasion of Iraq.
- When i want to leave, she still gives me 14 days to rethink my decision and says that she will be waiting for me all the time to come back home.
My CD Lamp
Customer Service..SBI istyle
Public sector companies have their own definition of customer service. I got a taste of SBI’s customer service few days back. It started with a advertisement on SBI website. I have reproduced the text from ther advt below.
“OnlineSBI enables you to open a new account online. You can apply for a new account only in branches where you already have accounts….”
I applied for one. After 2 weeks I get a call from SBI..Tring Tring..
me: Hello
SBI branch clerk: Me SBI tun bolthe aahe
me: Bola
SBI: Tumhi Account opening che request taakle hota kaa?
me: Ho..
SBI (thundering): Tumhi aas karat jaau naka!
me: Kai zala madam, Online option hota account open karach site madhe..
SBI (again thundering) : Tyana kai aahe! tey kai pan detat site madhe..aamcha kaam vadtya hai na…. Teh asa nahi hoth account open..Tumala bank madhe yaylach lagel..
me (in fear): Okk madam..
I love public sector companies 😉
Google’s love for Microsoft
Just came across this site http://www.fuck-microsoft.com/ which seems to be hosted on Google’s servers. Got this info by doing a reverse ip of google.com at http://www.yougetsignal.com/tools/web-sites-on-web-server/ .
Seems some Google engineers are having a good time 🙂
Blood group repository
Am trying out a small experiment of maintaining a common blood group repository. Anybody interested can checkout this link.
The form saves the data in a google spreadsheet. This could be helpful in times of emergency.
Please let me know any suggestions on this.
Fitting in the mould…
Ever wondered why as a child you had different talents, a curiosity for things which seems to be missing now. If you have managed to retain that curiosity then CONGRATULATIONS! Your are from the rare species.
I am sure from time to time we all experience a wave of situtations wherein we are faced with 2 choices.
1. Be original and do what you feel is right even if that means deviating from the regular route.
2. Do what is tried and tested or in other words “Fit in the mould”
Somehow the system is designed so that most of us chose the first option and in the process of growing up lose some good things in life . Some bravehearts do opt for the 2nd option and are many times ridiculed or are called “Idoits” in plain words 🙂
What’s your take on this? Do you feel fitting in the mould secures your life or does that makes life less interesting. Is Option 1 everybody’s cup of tea ?
As I always say “Please enlighten” 🙂